And I’m back. Brief absence - I apologise - but life, kids and deadlines rather got in the way of the blog. Plus Money Heist on Netflix. Good stuff.
It’s been a funny old week. On Monday we had an email from the headteacher at the kids’ school asking us to confirm whether or not we would be interested in our children returning to school on 22nd June. It came out of the blue to me, as at that stage there only seemed to be vague rumours floating around that schools were going to reopen to all years from the end of the month.
There was MUCH excitement in our house, from all quarters. We knew we’d only get a month of normality before breaking up for the six week summer holiday, but we’d take it. I didn’t really give it much thought before ticking the consent box on the school website.
Then on Tuesday your man Gavin Williamson came out to say actually, ahem, no. There would be no government-sanctioned school opening before September. Say WHAT? That well and truly popped our bubble (excuse the pun).
I had to break it to Henry that actually there had been something of a false alarm and he would not be going back for a few weeks of a disciplined, professional, expletive-free education.
THEN (stick with me) on Wednesday another email lands from the head asking us to please not forget to express our wishes by Friday at 4pm. Had she not read the news? It wasn’t happening!
But a flurry of messages between school friends, plus two minutes spent actually reading the news properly, revealed schools could open at their own discretion. Henry, you’re going back! Again! No, really, this time I mean it!
Thursday. It suddenly dawns on me that Bella may not be able to return to nursery, which is on the school site, because they officially started back on 1st June and we decided that was too soon. As a friend said yesterday, it felt a bit like our kids would be guinea pigs. A call to the school revealed they could fit her in for afternoons only from 22nd June. Eurgh. But still, three hours is better than none.
Then, on Friday, once the deadline had passed, we had an email to say due to popular demand they would be splitting the year groups and having children attend in two blocks, for two weeks apiece. Not ideal but still, better than nothing.
And it was only on Friday evening, when I realised Andy and I had at no point had a proper discussion about the pros and cons of the kids going back to school, that I stopped to actually consider the whole thing.
Do I want this? What actually are the pros and cons? Who am I listening to as I weigh them up? The government, the scientists, the news, my family, my friends, myself?
There are so many different variables we need to consider but the truth is, the only thing we know for certain is that to be absolutely sure they stay 100% safe we must keep them at home.
But does that mean it’s the right thing to do?
We have to believe schools are as safe as they can be, that distancing is being observed - or bubbles of the same handful of children kept together throughout - and that hand washing and general hygiene is being carried out properly.
We also have to remember they were in school right up till lockdown, when Coronavirus was rampaging unchecked through the community, with regular hand washing the only concession to the virus.
And, as hard as it is, I have to go against my instinct to protect my babies from all danger and balance out the benefits and the risks. We could take away their bikes if we were worried about unnecessary risk. And stop them climbing trees. Remove their bunk beds. Bleach every surface in the house three times a day. Cut up their food really small to prevent choking. Move to a bungalow.
There is risk everywhere. But the bottom line is they need some normality.
We spent yesterday in Epping Forest with some of their best friends. Henry and Leighton have been pals since their first day in Reception and are now basically inseparable. They’re kind of morphing into each other. They’ve recently set up a car washing business (total profits to date: £2) and are talking about moving into a flat together above the business premises. (No further information at this stage.)
Bella and Cassie, a year apart at school, have spent so much time in each other’s houses thanks to their brothers being mates that they are now just as close. I have recently had to break it to Bella that when she starts Reception in September she won’t be going into Cassie’s class, as Cassie will be going up to Year One. That was a tough conversation to have.
Yesterday we watched the boys tearing up and down trees, using their combined strength to (unsuccessfully) shift enormous logs, wading in and out of a filthy lake fully clothed, trying (unsuccessfully) to pull loose roots out of the forest floor, playing cricket using a pair of wellies as wickets, and never, ever pausing once in their absolutely constant flow of wittering that constitutes conversation when you’re six and seven.
Meanwhile, the girls spent hours filling jam jars with aforementioned filthy water, quietly gathering tennis balls into their fishing nets, squatting side by side at the edge of the lake deep in conversation and just getting on with whatever task they were absorbed in at any one time. They were calm, still and focused.
Which convinced me that we’re doing the right thing sending them back to school. They need to be around other, likeminded children. Children with the same energy levels, interests and intellect. They need to be with equals, not an older or younger sibling, of a different gender, who will always be vying for the attention of either two harassed, exhausted parents or one slightly alarmed baby who doesn’t get a moment’s peace from his adoring brother and sister.
I should stress that despite everything this blog suggests, we are only considering their welfare as we weigh it all up. I would never send them back just to save me the hassle of having them at home - on that my conscience is completely clear.
There are negatives we can’t help, the worst of which is we won’t be able to see our parents for the duration of their return to school + 14 days. So possibly a full six weeks. But the thought of heading into the summer holidays hot on the heels of four months at home seems terribly unfair.
We are just pinning our hopes on the stats that show children are not badly affected by COVID-19, and hope that should they bring it home we are not hit too hard either. And now as I write that it once again brings home the reality of the decision we are having to make.
I will only know if it was the right decision come mid-August, assuming we are all symptom free.
It's undoubtedly a risk, I just hope it’s a risk worth taking.
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